Velco Dog threw up last weekend. At first I wasn't too concerned. But it carried on. Soon he couldn't keep anything down.
Called my vet, but they were booked up for that evening. They could fit us in that morning, but I didn't think it was critical enough to leave work. Stupid me...
I took him to a clinic near my house that evening. They said it's probably cancer. Take him to the emergency clinic right now. That'll be $100, please.
Don't you think it's more likely that he swallowed a toy, I asked. They didn't.
I took him to the emergency clinic, where it costs $500 to confirm that what you've got is indeed a dog, but at least they're open all night. After running a bunch of pointless, stupid tests all night ($1700 up front, please and thanks) they eventually confirmed that he had swallowed a 'foreign body'.
I transferred him to my vet, because of course it was morning by this point. They took him in to surgery right away. Many hours later the vet called to say she had succeeded in removing the foreign body. She said it was red, looked like it might be a towel or something.
That'll be Santa Claus, I said. Sure enough, it was. I got it back (in a zip-lock baggy). There was so much internal damage that she had to remove a third of his small intestine to save his life.
Now I'm $5,000 poorer, Velcro Dog's got a foot-long row of staples up his belly, and our house is a stuffed-animal-free zone.