Description: Assistant to Gareth and Calvin. Narcissistic nuissance. Obsessor of details.
Named for: A professor of Defence Against the Dark Arts in Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. Gilderoy Lockhart was in love with himself and believed that everybody around him was motivated and inspired by him. He believed that people strived to emulate him, and that (as such) it was his duty to instruct people on how to be more like him. In the end, he was exposed as a fraud.
Noteworthy: You could make a fat lot of money if you could teach me to smile while Gilderoy talks.
Example: An exercise in futility