About the Virgin

  • me
    I'm in my 30s and I'm still a virgin. These are my stories.
  • also me
    Sometimes I'm funny. Who wouldn't be with all this pent-up energy?

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Tuesday, 08 November 2005


#*&!#@$ I commented before! WHERE DID IT GO?!?!?!

I have no idea. Are you sure it went through?

Yeah. What I had said was something along the lines of if I didn't know better, I'd take offense at the idea that your hatred of cooking is something that sets you apart from 'normal' women. We're not all Martha Stewart or her wannabes.

well i beat you in the height department but no stick insect here :(

i too do not fit typical. friends think it's fantastic, guys not so much. me? well i am who i am- the good, the bad, and the ugly. the older i get the better i like me.

Hey, I followed your URL from TCL, hopw you don't mind.

But I have to say that, I don't think you're weird at all. I say fuck society, and fuck it's norms, fuck them up their stupid asses.

seriously though, from what you've described, I'd say that you're a pretty cool person, and other than being a virgin at thirty, i can't think of anything really out of place. Also, I assuming that the whole virgin thing is a choice, so that pretty much puts you back up to par.

politics suck/ beleive what you want/ eat what you want/ watch what you want/ and do what you want/ that whole "heart of city" or "out in the boonies" thing. me too./life's ... well, life's life. take it asbest you can/ And fuckin laugh, laugh lots/ make as much money as you want, and buy whatever for whoever you want.

No i'd say you're a pretty cool chick. Some guys don't want average, some want someone to drive them.

And yeah dumb girls probably go get married more and faster... but to dumb guys, who probably spend the majority of the rest of their lives working shit jobs and watching reality tv. I have a feeling thats not what you're looking for.

you've got a lot going for you, and at the very least you've managed to work the phrase "a steaming pile of dog poop" into a fairly intellegent post. Kudos.

From your description, you sound great. But what do I know. You could be a crazed ax murderer.

Don't get mad at guys who are just trying to be polite by paying for dinner or offering to carry things for you. We don't think you can't pay your own way, or flex your own muscles. Sometimes we're really just trying to be nice. Although the fear of "damaging the womb" sounds hilarious to me. He was serious?

Somebody will love your differences. Any strict vegetarian that is pro-hunting is A-OK in my book. And I'm even more freakishly tall than you are -- by about 8 inches.

KtP: It's, you know, a trend. On it's own it signifies nothing. In conjuction with everything else on the list, it still signifies nothing. Well, it gives a picture of who I am.

J: The more you describe yourself, the more I think I know you. You weren't recently in Toronto visiting my roommate, were you?

Knattyb: Thank you. Come back any time.

FTN: I solemnly swear that I have not murdered any axes. Lately...

Oh, i've been quoted...great. This post made you the 3rd person to write on a very similar topic during such a short period (Ktp, Me and You)...what's that about? The time of year?

pretty sure we've never met.

the last time i was in TO was 2 years ago.

Umm, I'm not certain how I wound up here, but I think I can help some or at the very least provide some links and amusements. 'Sexless in the City' is 'Anna Broadway's' blog of her experiences being a committed Christian & a virgin in NYC. She's currently working on a book contract on the whole 'virgin in NYC' concept. She's 26 though. (There's quite a few 'virgin' blogs, but they come and go for all the obvious reasons). The link should be highlighted below, but she's easy to find. At the moment all her potential dates need to be chaperoned by a member of the family, which leaves her plenty of time to write. But she gets into some serious talk of the ethics of her decision on the blog. She's got plenty of links too.

Kameron Hurley's blog is here: [http://brutalwomen.blogspot.com/] she's a budding published SF author who also is a strong women who does not suffer fools gladly. She had plenty of fun in a recent blog post on MoDo's idiotic NYT column & book on 'Are men necessary'. [The whole Smart women = lonely women whine & BS]. Real Funny stuff from Kameron, she'd given up on men for years until a recent decent BF came into view just over this past summer. Most of 'em just weren't worth the bother.

I think your situation is far from unique, and the stats. while discouraging in one sense, [Kameron over at BrutalWomen also had a great riff on those studies on intelligent women and their likelihood of marriage], most women do eventually marry. It may take sometime to find the right fit with the right kind of guy, but it can happen. The total lifetime likelihood of marriage is better than 80%. So if someone told you that there was an 80% likelihood or rain in the forecast, you'd pick up your umbrella/rain gear going out the door right? That's what we're talking about here. It's all a matter of time. You've got about the same odds of mothering a child too.

So while you may think of yourself as somewhat of a strange duck, there's probably a decent match for you out there somewhere. And you'll be the perfect women for him. Cheers & Good Luck, 'VJ' [A UT Grad] {And no, that's not my real email}

i just think that one should not get worry about "the way you are" you know,you dont have to "struggle "to be different,because then it is not natural and it's all fake .When you're "different" you dont even think about it,you almost not even realized of it because its complety "normal" to you because is your nature,the way you are .It's just you!!Simple.

Well that is pretty harsh, you say you would get up and leave the guy just because he is responding to years of social stigma and not because of his true self. What if this dumb clueless guy (we all are dumb and clueless) is the the "man" that can make you happy? I love an intelligent and independent woman, you are not a freak but you seem to cling to that like a shield, some men are crap some are weak others a little of both and ultimately we are all dumb and clueless so take a hint i guess even in Canada there are good men...hey if not try to find a portuguese guy, couldn`t hurt....lol

Marry me :) I'm serious, i dreamed of a virgin bride like you for AGES. I'll do anything to have a relationship with you, and i'm very interested. EMAIL me.

You're absolutely charming.... I'm an old guy, 42...wait... god, sorry, didn't mean to lie, 44!!!!!!! Kill me now!!! ... I'm an American, and I consistently feel like I'm an asshole for being an American.................

I think you are great, and you remind me of me and my georgeous girlfriends, all single. I sometimes wonder where the men are, I mean REAL men, with balls and all?! :D

You appear very vain. To remain a virgin this long you must be sort of really full of yourself. Why not be a virgin and keep it to yourself and not publicize it as a selling point?

Hi I'm a cartoonist (disclaimer)

I found your blog by doing some sort of search for a C.S. Lewis passage. I find your blog and the topics covered fascinating.

This one kind of crossed me wrong though--as a man. What can us men do but desire a woman who will fulfill a semi-traditional role in our lives? I suppose we could remove the part of our hearts that makes us want to be like the strong men we admire--or like God (providers, protectors etc.)

Haha, I write this as my wife brings me a beer and a plate of food. Coincidence.

Email me if you want to talk about it. I want to change your mind on this topic, damnit.

Interesting. Except... Who but God gave me the same desires? I am strong. I am a protector. I am a provider. It's who I am; ergo, it's who he made me.

So fine... God wired most men that way and most women the corresponding opposite. So exactly how am I wrong?

I'm certainly not saying all women should be like me. Just that I am and that lowers my chances of finding a suitable mate.

I should clarify. This is the area of your post I'm responding to:

"When I first read that, every muscle in my body involuntarily clenched. The assumptions in that statement make my blood boil."

What I'm saying is, I wish you wouldn't be so quickly offended by those assumptions. You may not be the kind of woman who requires her man to pick up the check by default--and God bless you! But those established "assumptions" are not there to point out in what way women are inferior, but to remind a man to point out in what way women are sacred.

Chesterton said "The difference between man and woman accounts for almost everything important that has happened. We must realize that when we try to make man and woman alike."

I'm not accusing you of trying to make men and women alike, I know you're not. But those differences are important, so I don't think you should be offended by those old-fashioned niceties.

You have an amazing worldview and I really respect that. Any man who wouldn't want to date you is a fool.

I believe you are my soul mate... All that stuff you wrote to describe you is spot on ME! Pity I'm a female and not really homosexual (at present lol). But if I can beg a favour: please don't be mad at men for wanting to pay for your dinner etc etc. If too many of them get put off this tradition, it would be worse for females like me, who are NOT very well-off financially and LIKE to be wined and dined the old-fashioned, romantic way. Unfortunately, I have never had the pleasure; life is too unfair. :(

well actually maybe so. So for AVERAGE guys! ...they want average girls, they found match for each other. But you are not average and dont expect find an average guy!

Having said that, good self-esteem is always attractive...

no matter how different you are, do you enjoy yourself do you do your own thing? i found out by myself - that's the the only time i've got anywhere with women!

Though works both ways does not matter you are a guy or a girl, geek or not (btw i am, well a bit) you are happy with yourself, you are sorted.

actually i must say something, once i've read your blog - so here on the similar topic, I've read somewhere that women despise guys who buy them drinks, so I've stopped doing that.

Since then - girl FIRST buys me a drink - that my axiom. So one time invite this girl out and guess what... dont buy her a drink, where it should have been so much easier if I had done so.

There is a limit to every rule.

My suggestion is to guys, if she is ok with it buy her a drink dont make a big deal out of it especially if you invited her out. But if you are in a bar - if a stanger ask you to buy her a drink - never do it!

Ask her to buy you one first.

You seem like a nice girl. Don't get too caught up in statistics and that crap, love has no boundries. Just spend time with other people and I'm shure someone will find you interesting enough to start a relationship with you.

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